NOLA

What to do, and not do, in New Orleans.

After spending what seemed like two house payments in New Orleans only to lose the game, I have a few words of advice.

10. Do not laugh at the co-eds who are sleeping 16 in a room with nothing to eat but summer sausage and saltines. You were once like them.
9. Never look the test tube shot girl in the eye. She will not leave you alone. You don’t need everclear and tap water to have a good time.
8. Hand Sanitizer.
7. Burn your boots when you get home. You will not get the smell out of them.
6. Call the hogs in every cab, bar, restaurant, and bathroom you visit. They really like that.
5. Never write the address of your tailgate spot on a girl’s arm in black sharpie. Her boss will not like that Wednesday morning.
4. Every Ohio State fan you meet does not want to be asked, “Can you lead me to the closest tattoo parlor?”
3. Bring your own toilet paper. Paper towels are not a good substitute. Ever.
2. Do not use the Rickshaw under any circumstances. I guess if you like panic attacks and seeing your life flash in front of your eyes it is a good mode of transportation. Every part of my body was tense while on that thing. Even my ovaries were tense.
1. The horses do not want to be ridden. Even if you “Just want to hang onto the tail.”


Thank you for reading my post. Go Hogs.