Fifty Shades of Grey Review

Ok. So everyone is reading it. It is a book about sex. Different sex, but still just sex. Let’s just pick this apart bit by bit and I will tell you what I think.




The best part of this book is everyone’s reaction to it. I can honestly say there is nothing funnier than watching 20 women talk about this book at the Country Club after cocktails. NOTHING. Younger women make the comments like, “It turned me on, but the sex in it was just weird.” Older women say, “Weird sex? Who said weird sex? Hubs and I are reading this tonight!”



Others are just extremely quiet. They make facial expressions that mimic a dog in front of the TV. They are full of curiosity but cannot seem to find any words.



Or ladies who call them feng shui balls. Listen sister, there is definitely some ying and yang there but I do not think that is the name of them.



The next best part is listening to your friends attempting to figure out some of the positions. When you explain it to them they scream, “How do you know all this stuff? HUH? What have you been doing Missy? Does your mother know you understand these things????”



And yes my mother would be proud….of my reading comprehension. That’s it.



Some people say it is porn. It is written by a married woman. Please.



If Christian Grey was really named Frank Turner and worked as a butcher do you think anyone would read the book? Probably not. But I am willing to bet that Mrs. Frank Turner thinks he hung the moon, and would like the attention that is showered on Ana in the book. Every woman wants to be placed on a pedestal like Ana, and that is what really turns women on sexually. Some of us just would rather not be handcuffed to the pedestal.



I, personally, would endure a lot for a free personal trainer.



I did have one problem though. In that hotel room in Georgia…….. NOOOOOOOOO.

THAT IS NOT RIGHT. After reading that part I stood in my kitchen for a good 5 minutes before I picked up my jaw off the floor. And then I took a shower. A Silkwood shower.



Do not worry. This blog will not contain any details of the book. I am now on book two, and I am certain of one thing.



If I went to a party all “accessorized” like that, I would be hopping to the bar with my knees together.